August 18, 2011

no purpose entry. just not enough.


assalamualaikum and hey hey peeps.

i'm gonna do a lot of ranting
start.

macam biasa, i kelawar malam, i dapat idea malam-malam, my brain seems to function better at night. and much better after midnight. well i do read somewhere that 'aquarians need to learn how to shut their mind down at night because it tends to get very active around that time' . seriously, i do read zodiac kind of stuffs for fun and i don't really believe it, but this one sounds more like a fact. 

i have no idea why but my tendency to blog is at peak around three to four a.m in the morning. like seriously? normal people actually SLEEP at that time.well, i'm no sleeping beauty, and it seems like i've been neglecting my beauty sleep too.lol

actually i'm having a slight confusion in my mind currently. yeahh. well, i got confused all the time.lol
i think i'm not trying hard enough to be better.

literally, in everything.

i want to be better in school, i want to be better in graphic editing, i want to be better in blogging, i want to be better at love and relationship (not that i'm in any right now), i want to be a better daughter, i want to be a better sister, i want to be better at cooking (not that i can't cook), i want to be better in my english and korean, i want to be better financially, ohh god if i'm writing it all here, it'll be endless.

for all those things i said above, it's not that i suck at it (except my studies, it gets worst now -__-'')
i'm just acting out of my perfectionist attitude and sometimes i get so sick at it.

why? when i do something, i ALWAYS feels like it is not good enough.

demmm, even writing this write now worsen my mood.
i still have tons to rants but i better stop now or i might not be able to sleep later.

ok. stop.

p/s: i'm still grateful of who i am now  thanks allah but i wish to be a lot better :) just in case
p/p/s: and then i realized, that's what life means, to get better ;D

so jadikan hari ini lebih baik dari sebelumnya ^3<

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